Editor’s Note: From the Back Forty is Liberty Nation’s longest-running and most popular weekly column. Capturing the truth each week from heartlanders in flyover states, LN gives voice to the hard-working Americans otherwise ignored by the coastal elites.
Heartlanders do not appreciate the low morals of a cheater – whether it’s dominoes, a fast-paced game of Euchre, a political ad chock full of slander and lies, or a paid-off judge for the pie contest at the county fair. When the fix is in, flyover folks get their ire up and have at it. And it doesn’t matter if it’s an election or a cornhole tournament. Cheating is cheating, and fur will fly – you can bet your sweet bippy.
Folks Are Anxious Over Midterms
One can tell the difference between a person who follows politics and those who just like to complain. The first has statistics, talks about different candidates and issues, and knows how a constitutional republic is supposed to run. The others say, “I feel” or “I deserve” way too much in a friendly debate.
Dave Metcalf in Arizona has a keen eye on the governor and Senate contests. His assessment: a Red Wave is imminent: “Do they not recall how short [Obama’s] coattails were as President? The fact they are using Obama so much is a sign of extreme desperation, as well as an indication of how terrible Biden is.”
Sue Shanley weighed in from New Mexico. Conservatives in that state have been subject to a Democrat super-majority and have no idea how their governor, Michelle Lujan Grisham, in all of her goofy stunts, bad press, and dance moves, can still retain her job:
“I am concerned about ALL our elections. After last year as well as some prior, smaller FUBARs…can we trust our elections any longer? NM is in dire need of change…I fear we have been too divided over the last two years to find resolve.”
But it was President Joe Biden, in his latest stump speech to save democracy, that set folks in the middle on edge:
“We know that more and more ballots are cast in early voting or by mail in America. We know that many states don’t start counting those ballots till after the polls close on Nov 8. That means, in some cases we won’t know the winner of the election for a few days — until a few days after the election. It takes time to count all legitimate ballots in a legal and orderly manner. It’s always been important for citizens in the democracy to be informed and engaged. Now it’s important for a citizen to be patient as well. That’s how this is supposed to work.”
Heartlanders felt that something was up, and it wouldn’t be pleasant. Erik Haglund did not beat around the bush in Rochester, MN: “Am I the only one thinking this? There needs to be teams of lawyers in every polling place from start to finish. Every single ballot needs to be overseen in close proximity by R observers!”
Call them what you will: election deniers, conspiracy theorists, or crazies – they do bring up the concerns of all voters. But the real cheating scandal rocking the Heartland goes to the heart of all — whether Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, or Independent: Cornhole.
Cornhole Has Been Violated by Cheating
The competitive backyard game of cornhole is a staple for homes across middle America: you know, places where people must mow a half-acre because not everything is concrete. Every home has one, and cookouts would just be lame without a friendly game, with the winner buying the next cooler of Busch. Top ACL players can earn up to a cool quarter million by tossing a bean bag 27 feet onto an inclined wooden frame with a hole in the middle. Almost like horseshoes, without the metal. The American Cornhole League regulations state cornhole resin bean-filled bags must be six by six inches when lying flat and 16 ounces.
But hearts were broken as news leaked out about BagGate. Devon Harbaugh pointed fingers at the number one ranked doubles team: Mark Richards and Philip Lopez. The allegation was cheating by the use of lighter bags. Well, officials tested both teams finding neither was using regulation bags. Is nothing sacred?
One member of a Cornhole fan page on Facebook hinted that the sport could be treacherous: “I think it’s funny that anyone believed it would be all friendships and rose petals forever in cornhole. Now the dirty underbelly is being exposed.” And that’s when Charlie Harrington piped up, claiming, “It’s Trump’s fault!”
